The Zero-Energy List: Releasing Unnecessary Burdens of Teacher Life

Christina Whitlock, NCTM

MTNA Business Digest, Volume 3, Issue 4

July 2024

Teachers are emotionally connected to their work in a deep way. After all, students are more than numbers on a spreadsheet; they are long-term investments involving untold hours of planning and care. Essential as it may be, it’s that very emotional connection that sometimes leads us down the wrong path.

I work with many teachers in various stages of burnout. Oftentimes, we discover their true source of discontent relates to emotional burdens they have taken on unnecessarily.

I made a promise to myself years ago, and it dramatically increased my satisfaction as a piano teacher. I call it my Zero-Energy List, and I’d love to share it with you now.

My Zero-Energy List is a compilation of three things I refuse to spend mental resources on.

If I find myself perseverating on any of these things, I immediately remind myself these are matters beyond my control. If I am tempted to take personal offense to anything on this list, I do my best to shut down those thoughts before they send me into a downward spiral.

Allow me to introduce you to the three areas of my Zero-Energy List:

1. Parenting Choices

We have all found ourselves wishing studio parents would behave differently.

Why do they allow their child to do that?
Does this child get any attention at home?
Why is that parent so critical?

My role as teacher does not involve assessing the merits of parental approaches. Putting this truth into words has been one of the most freeing decisions of my teaching career. As with many things in life, this comes down to knowing what is mine to control and what isn’t.

For instance, I have control over how I allow students to behave in my studio. If a child is being disrespectful to me, I address it.

Simply saying, “We do not speak that way here” is far more productive than stewing over why my student’s parents have failed to teach him any manners.

Yet, the potential discomfort of that conversation leads many teachers to avoid it. We subconsciously commit to judging the parent internally, fueling our frustrations. In other words, we’ve picked up a burden that was not ours to carry.

2. How Money is Spent

Online studio teacher forums are full of conversation threads about studio parents who appear to live extravagant lifestyles yet haggle for tuition discounts and policy exceptions. Few topics appear to draw more sarcastic camaraderie than this one.

We never know the true details of a family’s financial situation. Someone else might be paying for vacation. They may not be able to afford lessons because all their resources are going towards living in that wealthy neighborhood. The details are irrelevant and only detract from the joy I find in my work.

What matters to me is the way I run my business. If I’m content with my policies and tuition structure, I do not need to worry about how my families are spending their money.

3. How Students Spend Their Time

Time is precious, and we’re all protective of ours. Ultimately, I have no control over how a student spends their week. I refuse to waste my energy lamenting other activities or life’s distractions from practice time.

Again, I consider what I can control:

I can control the lesson experience I provide, regardless of preparation.
I can communicate my expectations clearly.
I can do my best to make my student feel motivated to work at home this coming week.

…But I cannot control theater rehearsals, exam schedules and that surprise trip out of town. Therefore, I will not allow these things to bring negativity to my work.

I hope you enjoyed this synopsis of my Zero-Energy List. I strongly encourage you to build one of your own. Examine sources of frustration in your work and ask yourself if these are burdens worth carrying or releasing.

It is important to remember we get only a glimpse into our students’ lives. Their existence outside our studio walls is largely a mystery. It is easy to convince ourselves we understand the dynamics of a particular family when we really have no idea. We cannot assume the parent-child relationship we witness during the lesson is the same as it is at home.

It boils down to this: Life is full of choices. If we stay focused on making decisions that provide us the life we desire, there is no need to spend energy on judgements that distract us from what truly matters.

Christina Whitlock, MM, NCTM, fancies herself a friend and philosopher to the piano teaching profession. Connecting primarily with audiences through the Beyond Measure Podcast, she enjoys supporting this community in many ways. Check out ChristinaWhitlock.com .